You may have in your travels come across a bill in your change telling you to track it at www.whereswilly.com
The very thing happened to me a few years ago, and I took the time to register. And then I forgot all about it. That is until I got a 20 with a handwritten plea to track it on the weekend. (I did, it's last known location was in Dorval)
Now, I do a lot of useless things online - including maintaining a blog - but this is something even I can't keep on top of. There are folks out there however who not only make the time to enter all their bills, but also use a rubber stamp on them so others will track the bill as well - resulting on a hit.
It's worth the surf just to watch the travels of our currency. And if you get a bill asking to be tracked, do the proper Canadian thing and register it.
Categories: Links
2007-02-26
Friday Feast #132
Appetizer
Where on your body do you have a scar, and what caused it?
The most noticeable is down my chest, and was caused by a scalpel.
Soup
What is something that has happened to you that you would consider a miracle?
A co-worker several years ago went through something that he considered a miracle. Both he and his wife worked for the store. Things were very tight that month, and they didn't know how they'd make rent. He is a proud man, and was very reluctant to ask the owner for an advance, even though we all knew the owner always obliged without questions.
So that night he prayed, and he looked to his Bible to give him the humility needed to ask for help. Something fell out. It was two cheques - by now stale - one for each as part of the annual vacation payout. He brought them in to work the next day, and the owner was pleased to make good on them that day.
The kicker to all this being, he put them in the Bible in the first place, as he prayed for guidance to spend the unexpected wealth wisely.
Me on the other hand, thought it was a miracle that I got out of bed on Sunday.
Salad
Name a television personality who really gets on your nerves.
Lately, and the first to come to mind is Tom Brown. The weather guy for CTV is described by them as having a "unique fun and exciting style." I just can't stand how bloody happy he is all the time. I figure the tea drinking crowd just loves him. My mother, for example. Actually, he wouldn't get on my nerves at all if I were watching him with Mom in the room. I have witnessed her many times in the past getting visibly pissed off over a hot snap, for example. So Tom and Mom would technically cancel each other out. White noise.
Main Course
What was a funny word you said as a child (such as "pasketti" for "spaghetti")?
By Toronto's standards, every word I said as a child was funny, given my now-faded Nova Scotia accent. It's funny - you can make fun of an Atlantic Canadian's accent, but it's taboo to do the same with an ethnic one.
Dessert
Fill in the blank: I have always thought ______ was ______.
Fill it in yourself.
Categories: Feast
Where on your body do you have a scar, and what caused it?
The most noticeable is down my chest, and was caused by a scalpel.
Soup
What is something that has happened to you that you would consider a miracle?
A co-worker several years ago went through something that he considered a miracle. Both he and his wife worked for the store. Things were very tight that month, and they didn't know how they'd make rent. He is a proud man, and was very reluctant to ask the owner for an advance, even though we all knew the owner always obliged without questions.
So that night he prayed, and he looked to his Bible to give him the humility needed to ask for help. Something fell out. It was two cheques - by now stale - one for each as part of the annual vacation payout. He brought them in to work the next day, and the owner was pleased to make good on them that day.
The kicker to all this being, he put them in the Bible in the first place, as he prayed for guidance to spend the unexpected wealth wisely.
Me on the other hand, thought it was a miracle that I got out of bed on Sunday.
Salad
Name a television personality who really gets on your nerves.
Lately, and the first to come to mind is Tom Brown. The weather guy for CTV is described by them as having a "unique fun and exciting style." I just can't stand how bloody happy he is all the time. I figure the tea drinking crowd just loves him. My mother, for example. Actually, he wouldn't get on my nerves at all if I were watching him with Mom in the room. I have witnessed her many times in the past getting visibly pissed off over a hot snap, for example. So Tom and Mom would technically cancel each other out. White noise.
Main Course
What was a funny word you said as a child (such as "pasketti" for "spaghetti")?
By Toronto's standards, every word I said as a child was funny, given my now-faded Nova Scotia accent. It's funny - you can make fun of an Atlantic Canadian's accent, but it's taboo to do the same with an ethnic one.
Dessert
Fill in the blank: I have always thought ______ was ______.
Fill it in yourself.
Categories: Feast
2007-02-19
Friday Feast #131
Appetizer
What sound, other than the normal ringing, would you like your telephone to make?
I worked in an office in which the phones only had one ring tone to choose from. As a result, if you were away from your desk, you could never tell if it was your phone that was ringing. I often said we should be able to program our phones. I wanted to reprogram my ringer to say, "Ian, your phone is ringing."
Soup
Describe your usual disposition in meteorological terms (partly cloudy, sunny, stormy, etc.).
I'm generally overcast but leave others with the perception they're under a Tornado Watch.
Salad
What specific subject do you feel you know better than any other subjects?
It would probably be call centre planning, forecasting and scheduling.
Main Course
Imagine you were given the ability to remember everything you read for one entire day. Which books/magazines/newspapers would you choose to read?
I would read an encyclopedia. But only one day, eh? I could be really knowledgeable in things A-D in that time frame.
Dessert
If a popular candy maker contacted you to create their next confection, what would it be like and what would you name it?
Neilson used to make a chocolate bar called Treasures. It would be like that, and I would name it the same.
No sense in reinventing the wheel.
Categories: Feast
What sound, other than the normal ringing, would you like your telephone to make?
I worked in an office in which the phones only had one ring tone to choose from. As a result, if you were away from your desk, you could never tell if it was your phone that was ringing. I often said we should be able to program our phones. I wanted to reprogram my ringer to say, "Ian, your phone is ringing."
Soup
Describe your usual disposition in meteorological terms (partly cloudy, sunny, stormy, etc.).
I'm generally overcast but leave others with the perception they're under a Tornado Watch.
Salad
What specific subject do you feel you know better than any other subjects?
It would probably be call centre planning, forecasting and scheduling.
Main Course
Imagine you were given the ability to remember everything you read for one entire day. Which books/magazines/newspapers would you choose to read?
I would read an encyclopedia. But only one day, eh? I could be really knowledgeable in things A-D in that time frame.
Dessert
If a popular candy maker contacted you to create their next confection, what would it be like and what would you name it?
Neilson used to make a chocolate bar called Treasures. It would be like that, and I would name it the same.
No sense in reinventing the wheel.
Categories: Feast
2007-02-13
Friday Feast #130
Appetizer -
Have you been sick yet this winter? If so, what did you come down with?
I have suffered nothing more than a very mild cold. The skin on my hands have gone to hell though, and nothing seems to be working.
Soup -
What colors dominate your closet?
Shoot, I don't know. I'm very balanced with my wardrobe these days. Let's say grey.
Salad -
How would you describe your personal "comfort zone"?
I never refer to things against my comfort zone. I'm not about to.
Main Course -
On which reality show would you really like to be a contestant?
If I had to choose one - because I don't really want to be on any - probably Big Brother, 'cause they have air conditioning and you pretty much just sit around all day.
Dessert -
Which holiday would you consider to be your favorite?
Canada Day.
Categories: Feast
Have you been sick yet this winter? If so, what did you come down with?
I have suffered nothing more than a very mild cold. The skin on my hands have gone to hell though, and nothing seems to be working.
Soup -
What colors dominate your closet?
Shoot, I don't know. I'm very balanced with my wardrobe these days. Let's say grey.
Salad -
How would you describe your personal "comfort zone"?
I never refer to things against my comfort zone. I'm not about to.
Main Course -
On which reality show would you really like to be a contestant?
If I had to choose one - because I don't really want to be on any - probably Big Brother, 'cause they have air conditioning and you pretty much just sit around all day.
Dessert -
Which holiday would you consider to be your favorite?
Canada Day.
Categories: Feast
2007-02-03
Friday Feast #129
Appetizer
What was one of the fashion fads when you were a teenager?
I moved to da T-dot from a small town just in time for high school. As a result I was unable to keep up with the fads. The biggest thing to wear was a Roots sweatshirt. Or a Polo (as in striped oxford cut) shirt. I was must struck by the hair. If you were a guy, you likely had a mushroom haircut or a rat tail. Or both. Girls had some portion of their head shaved. Or just shitloads of hair. Despite my Sears Catalogue upbringing, I managed to get both shirts. My hair of course has never seen the price of a 'style.'
Soup
Name one thing you think people assume about you when they first meet you.
Gosh, I haven't thought about this. Although one common theme is they assume I'm an asshole.
Salad
On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being highest, how hard do you work?
I've been at about a 7, but I need to pull it into 10 the next few weeks.
Main Course
If you were given a free 30-second commercial during the Super Bowl to sell anything you currently own, what would you advertise?
Mookie. Duh.
Dessert
Fill in the blank: I love to ________ when it is _________.
I love to sleep when it is raining.
Yeah, I know. I've been behind on my posts - you'd expect more effort on my part in filling out the blanks.
Categories: Feast
What was one of the fashion fads when you were a teenager?
I moved to da T-dot from a small town just in time for high school. As a result I was unable to keep up with the fads. The biggest thing to wear was a Roots sweatshirt. Or a Polo (as in striped oxford cut) shirt. I was must struck by the hair. If you were a guy, you likely had a mushroom haircut or a rat tail. Or both. Girls had some portion of their head shaved. Or just shitloads of hair. Despite my Sears Catalogue upbringing, I managed to get both shirts. My hair of course has never seen the price of a 'style.'
Soup
Name one thing you think people assume about you when they first meet you.
Gosh, I haven't thought about this. Although one common theme is they assume I'm an asshole.
Salad
On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being highest, how hard do you work?
I've been at about a 7, but I need to pull it into 10 the next few weeks.
Main Course
If you were given a free 30-second commercial during the Super Bowl to sell anything you currently own, what would you advertise?
Mookie. Duh.
Dessert
Fill in the blank: I love to ________ when it is _________.
I love to sleep when it is raining.
Yeah, I know. I've been behind on my posts - you'd expect more effort on my part in filling out the blanks.
Categories: Feast
2007-01-31
A chance to see Lower Bay Station
If you're in the know, you know that Bay Station actually has two platform levels. The platform below the currently-used Bay Station was in use for only about six months after the Bloor-Danforth line opened in '66.
Every other train on the B-D line would go downtown via the University line at Bay. If that's where you were headed, this was a good thing. This routing meant both Bay and St George had four platforms serving three directions. The Eastbound train would alternate between the two levels at Bay, Westbound doing the same at St George. The routing also meant the entire system could feel the effects of a delay.
So its entrances were boarded up and Lower Bay became a station of neglect.
Much like Upper Bay. And the entire system. Non-revenue trains have continued to use the tracks ever since, primarily to switch lines and for crew training. It's other main purpose is to serve as a set (for a nominal fee) to a number of TV and movie productions.
So here we have a subway station that's been closed for 40 years and next to nil access. A magnet for infiltrators and a curiosity-inducer for urban explorers. As good fortune would have it, the tunnel between Bay and St George needs some repairs.
This means on weekends starting later this month this chunk of tunnel will be closed. If the plan goes as expected, both the East and West trains will terminate at Museum. Trains will get to and from Yonge/Bloor via - you got it, Lower Bay. It's not stopping at the station but still.
So unless you're a TTC employee, work for a production company or are an infiltrator this is likely your only chance to see the other half.
Check out Transit Toronto in my links for lots more about the TTC both past and present.
Categories: Transit, Urban, Exploration
Every other train on the B-D line would go downtown via the University line at Bay. If that's where you were headed, this was a good thing. This routing meant both Bay and St George had four platforms serving three directions. The Eastbound train would alternate between the two levels at Bay, Westbound doing the same at St George. The routing also meant the entire system could feel the effects of a delay.
So its entrances were boarded up and Lower Bay became a station of neglect.
Much like Upper Bay. And the entire system. Non-revenue trains have continued to use the tracks ever since, primarily to switch lines and for crew training. It's other main purpose is to serve as a set (for a nominal fee) to a number of TV and movie productions.So here we have a subway station that's been closed for 40 years and next to nil access. A magnet for infiltrators and a curiosity-inducer for urban explorers. As good fortune would have it, the tunnel between Bay and St George needs some repairs.
This means on weekends starting later this month this chunk of tunnel will be closed. If the plan goes as expected, both the East and West trains will terminate at Museum. Trains will get to and from Yonge/Bloor via - you got it, Lower Bay. It's not stopping at the station but still.
So unless you're a TTC employee, work for a production company or are an infiltrator this is likely your only chance to see the other half.
Check out Transit Toronto in my links for lots more about the TTC both past and present.
Categories: Transit, Urban, Exploration
2007-01-29
Friday Feast #128
Appetizer
If you could take lessons to learn any musical instrument, which would you want to learn?
I'm no good with anything to do with music. During our exploration of the Crystal Ballroom, my friend Bruce walked up to the piano - discarded in the middle of this huge space - and hammered out a few notes. I thought it was really cool and therefore I would like to learn to play the piano.
Soup
Have you ever mistaken a person for someone else?
Yes I have and I hate it. I therefore am never the first person to speak. Seriously, I recently mistook some stranger for another colleague at work. this of course is because they have similar features. Kind of related - have you ever had one of these conversations:
"Do you know so-an-so?"
"No."
"Oh, because you look just like him."
Salad
On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being highest, how well do you keep secrets?
It depends on the context, so I won't give a rating. I surmise it's somewhere below average.
Main Course
What's the closest you've ever been to a dangerous animal?
Again, it depends on the context, and I have a dirty mind.
Dessert
When was the last time you lost your patience?
I'm a very level person, as anyone would tell you. When in the hell are these questions going to get interesting! Sheesh!
Categories: Feast
If you could take lessons to learn any musical instrument, which would you want to learn?
I'm no good with anything to do with music. During our exploration of the Crystal Ballroom, my friend Bruce walked up to the piano - discarded in the middle of this huge space - and hammered out a few notes. I thought it was really cool and therefore I would like to learn to play the piano.
Soup
Have you ever mistaken a person for someone else?
Yes I have and I hate it. I therefore am never the first person to speak. Seriously, I recently mistook some stranger for another colleague at work. this of course is because they have similar features. Kind of related - have you ever had one of these conversations:
"Do you know so-an-so?"
"No."
"Oh, because you look just like him."
Salad
On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being highest, how well do you keep secrets?
It depends on the context, so I won't give a rating. I surmise it's somewhere below average.
Main Course
What's the closest you've ever been to a dangerous animal?
Again, it depends on the context, and I have a dirty mind.
Dessert
When was the last time you lost your patience?
I'm a very level person, as anyone would tell you. When in the hell are these questions going to get interesting! Sheesh!
Categories: Feast
Today's Free Item
I stopped for some groceries and lucked in today with a 2 litre PC Cola. I was planning on buying it (for I'm out of mix) anyway. I noticed the price portion or the shelf label had been ripped off other PC flavours, but not the Cola.
*Free item not exactly as illustrated
Sure enough, it scanned in at $.99 but had a shelf sticker of $.89.
This represents the smallest price difference and the cheapest free item. The interaction at the counter they call "customer service" was priceless, however.
Girl (In photolab shirt): Did you want customer service?
Me: Um, yes.
Girl: Sorry, I can't help you.
Me: What if I wanted to pick up pictures? Could you help me then?
Girl: Yes! Did you want to pick up pictures?
Me: No, I want customer service.
When someone who could help me showed up shortly after, I went through the same routine I always do. It started with "Are you sure you were overcharged? It was only 99 cents"
Come to think of it, that's pretty much where it ended as well, since she didn't say anything else to me.
I readily took my $1.13 given to me in cash, taking note of how it was made perfectly clear to me on a previous occasion refunds for debit transactions need to be on debit. I decide not to press my luck. I grab my stuff and bolt for the door.
On a related note, it appears Loblaws does read MLH. There were ample baskets at the entrance today. In a seven foot pile. It made me smile.
Categories: Retail
*Free item not exactly as illustrated
Sure enough, it scanned in at $.99 but had a shelf sticker of $.89.
This represents the smallest price difference and the cheapest free item. The interaction at the counter they call "customer service" was priceless, however.
Girl (In photolab shirt): Did you want customer service?
Me: Um, yes.
Girl: Sorry, I can't help you.
Me: What if I wanted to pick up pictures? Could you help me then?
Girl: Yes! Did you want to pick up pictures?
Me: No, I want customer service.
When someone who could help me showed up shortly after, I went through the same routine I always do. It started with "Are you sure you were overcharged? It was only 99 cents"
Come to think of it, that's pretty much where it ended as well, since she didn't say anything else to me.
I readily took my $1.13 given to me in cash, taking note of how it was made perfectly clear to me on a previous occasion refunds for debit transactions need to be on debit. I decide not to press my luck. I grab my stuff and bolt for the door.
On a related note, it appears Loblaws does read MLH. There were ample baskets at the entrance today. In a seven foot pile. It made me smile.
Categories: Retail
Friday Feast #127
Appetizer
Which television shows do you just refuse to miss?
I'm not a huge TV watcher - in fact, I couldn't tell you anything about any of the prime time dramas. I'm always sure to watch the Mercer Report and SNL.
Soup
Who did you last speak to on the telephone?
A co-worker on the other end of the floor. We were talking about who (which department) was supposed to pay an invoice. It was agreed she would pay it. Except I came to learn we already paid the stupid invoice, because we're so bloody efficient. Go team!
Salad
How many pillows do you keep on your bed?
Usually four, if you count the floor. I use two under my head, and one for huggage.
Main Course
Name one addition to your computer (software, hardware, etc.) that you’d love to have.
I'd love a new computer. I should look into that...
Dessert
What is your favorite foreign food?
I once referred to a boyfriend as that. Currently my fave foreign food is the Donair.
Categories: Feast
2007-01-13
Friday Feast #126
Appetizer
What comes to mind when you see the color orange?
The 1970s.
Soup
Did you ever get in trouble while you were in school? If so, what was it for?
I was a pretty good kid. I got in trouble once in grade 8 for getting in a fight with my friend. To teach us to get along, we both had to pick up acorns from the parking lot until the bus left.
Salad
Which topping(s) make up your perfect pizza?
I'm into Pineapple and Ham these days.
Main Course
Do you believe in UFOs/aliens/etc.? Why or why not?
UFOs do exist, and they're reported all the time. I don't belive they are from a different world, however. Just not identified. I simply haven't seen enough evidence to support the theory.
Dessert
What color is your bedspread/comforter/quilt?
It's a light brown with black trim.
Categories: Feast
What comes to mind when you see the color orange?
The 1970s.
Soup
Did you ever get in trouble while you were in school? If so, what was it for?
I was a pretty good kid. I got in trouble once in grade 8 for getting in a fight with my friend. To teach us to get along, we both had to pick up acorns from the parking lot until the bus left.
Salad
Which topping(s) make up your perfect pizza?
I'm into Pineapple and Ham these days.
Main Course
Do you believe in UFOs/aliens/etc.? Why or why not?
UFOs do exist, and they're reported all the time. I don't belive they are from a different world, however. Just not identified. I simply haven't seen enough evidence to support the theory.
Dessert
What color is your bedspread/comforter/quilt?
It's a light brown with black trim.
Categories: Feast
2007-01-08
Halifax Nightlife
Another entry originally drafted during my trip to the Fax.
I managed on the Friday before Christmas to get out and soak in the nightlife of Halifax. Now Haligonians are not a cosmopolitan lot. In fact, most would tell you Cosmopolitan is an ice cream flavour.
Halifax is there because that's where the harbour is. See, where there's a harbour there is always a navy and a good deal of shipping. So a bunch of people got together, called themselves Haligonians (because the were go'n to Halifax) and off they went. These Haligonians of course were Brewers, Bartenders and Hookers. This means the joint generally booms when there's war, and is pretty sucky in peace time. Its bars have historically held sailors still on their sea legs, clutching a shore pass - hoping to get a couple shots, a pint of Keith's, find a fight, and pick up some tail before their ship's horn blows.
Most holds true today.
For instance: I've been in town when some Marines hit shore on Tuesday night. The bars were hopping with handsome young men enjoying a few of something they weren't old enough to have back in South Carolina. Intermingled in the crowd of course were the girls that just happened to show up, as if it were a Saturday.
And then there are Halifags. They, as with the rest of the town have a rich Military Tradition.
I went through the Halifax Drinking Checklist while crossing the Harbour in the Ferry:
I started my evening at Cheers in the Liquor Dome. Cheers is a place quite different than one on the show, just so you know. The crowd gets younger as the day progresses. She opens her doors for the day to the walker crowd, and is kicking the university crowd out at last call.
I arrived at nine. That's how old I am.
I had a grand time listening to conversation at the bar. One very nice and equally drunk regular bought me a pint of Keith's. What made it special for the holiday season was his friends convinced him it was time to go home immediately after, so I got to enjoy it in Peace.
The band finally started up. I love Halifax bands! I have no clue however what the name of this particular band is. They were all over the map in their set, from U2 to NS. And the lead singer was a hottie. Overall, an awesome set. As they took a break, I knew it was time for me to bounce, as it were.
For Cheers hit that time bubble where the generational shift begins in the crowd. As the younger patrons begin to stream in, the older crowd is getting to look like a bunch of freaks. It is their last call. The guys realise they only have one more chance to drop their date rape drug in some one's drink. The ladies order one more drink then go to the washroom.
Trying to shake the bone-chilling breeder display I just endured, off I went to the Cabaret.
Rejections is still the spot. It's been 10 years since I first set foot in there, and have probably been there less than 5 times before. The look never changes, and neither does the crowd. It still considers itself to have a mixed crowd, which it does. The straight component however is generally there to pick up drugs.
I was there early. The place doesn't gain momentum until Happy Hour, which runs 11-1. It's a frugal crowd, to be sure. I enjoy being there early so I can people-watch. Now, if you've ever seen Trailer Park Boys, you may be of the opinion that the crowd scenes are poorly acted.
As I scanned the few people there, a startling feeling came over me that I was dropped into the middle of a TPB episode. I began to realise - this could be the Toronto influence in me - that indeed, Halifax is poorly acted.
All I could do was get myself some $2.50 Keith's and enjoy the music. And then Paul cheers' me. I ask where he's from.
"Don't laugh," he pleads.
"I won't"
"Canning. The Valley."
I laugh, then quickly tell him I used to live in the Valley. Through the night, he will never ask and I will never reveal that I am from Toronto. I'm smitten with Valley guys. And I find myself with something to do while I'm enjoying my Keith's. I spend the rest of the evening enjoying brief encounters with Paul.
At some point well after Happy Hour, I asked Paul where he was staying.
"Across the street"
"At the hotel?"
"No in the parking lot, in my car. I'm going to nap before I drive back tomorrow."
It became obvious it was time to leave. And off I went into the night.
Well, I necked with Paul for a while and copped a couple really decent feels. Then I left after telling him I was going to the bar.
Halifax is like that. She will show you a good time, but will usually pull back at the last minute. Like many of her hookers.
Categories: Breeders, Clubs, Gay, People, Travel
I managed on the Friday before Christmas to get out and soak in the nightlife of Halifax. Now Haligonians are not a cosmopolitan lot. In fact, most would tell you Cosmopolitan is an ice cream flavour.
Halifax is there because that's where the harbour is. See, where there's a harbour there is always a navy and a good deal of shipping. So a bunch of people got together, called themselves Haligonians (because the were go'n to Halifax) and off they went. These Haligonians of course were Brewers, Bartenders and Hookers. This means the joint generally booms when there's war, and is pretty sucky in peace time. Its bars have historically held sailors still on their sea legs, clutching a shore pass - hoping to get a couple shots, a pint of Keith's, find a fight, and pick up some tail before their ship's horn blows.
Most holds true today.
For instance: I've been in town when some Marines hit shore on Tuesday night. The bars were hopping with handsome young men enjoying a few of something they weren't old enough to have back in South Carolina. Intermingled in the crowd of course were the girls that just happened to show up, as if it were a Saturday.
And then there are Halifags. They, as with the rest of the town have a rich Military Tradition.
I went through the Halifax Drinking Checklist while crossing the Harbour in the Ferry:
- Know the bar before you start staring at people.
- Halifax is on a hill. Choose a venue keeping this in mind. There's nothing worse than trying to crawl up a hill drunk.
- Donairs are a seemingly good idea at 3 in the morning. Remember you will smell like a donair and stale beer in the morning.
- The only place to get a cab after midnight is at the Casino. You'll save more time staggering there than trying to flag one down on the street.
I started my evening at Cheers in the Liquor Dome. Cheers is a place quite different than one on the show, just so you know. The crowd gets younger as the day progresses. She opens her doors for the day to the walker crowd, and is kicking the university crowd out at last call.
I arrived at nine. That's how old I am.
I had a grand time listening to conversation at the bar. One very nice and equally drunk regular bought me a pint of Keith's. What made it special for the holiday season was his friends convinced him it was time to go home immediately after, so I got to enjoy it in Peace.
The band finally started up. I love Halifax bands! I have no clue however what the name of this particular band is. They were all over the map in their set, from U2 to NS. And the lead singer was a hottie. Overall, an awesome set. As they took a break, I knew it was time for me to bounce, as it were.
For Cheers hit that time bubble where the generational shift begins in the crowd. As the younger patrons begin to stream in, the older crowd is getting to look like a bunch of freaks. It is their last call. The guys realise they only have one more chance to drop their date rape drug in some one's drink. The ladies order one more drink then go to the washroom.
Trying to shake the bone-chilling breeder display I just endured, off I went to the Cabaret.
Rejections is still the spot. It's been 10 years since I first set foot in there, and have probably been there less than 5 times before. The look never changes, and neither does the crowd. It still considers itself to have a mixed crowd, which it does. The straight component however is generally there to pick up drugs.
I was there early. The place doesn't gain momentum until Happy Hour, which runs 11-1. It's a frugal crowd, to be sure. I enjoy being there early so I can people-watch. Now, if you've ever seen Trailer Park Boys, you may be of the opinion that the crowd scenes are poorly acted.
As I scanned the few people there, a startling feeling came over me that I was dropped into the middle of a TPB episode. I began to realise - this could be the Toronto influence in me - that indeed, Halifax is poorly acted.
All I could do was get myself some $2.50 Keith's and enjoy the music. And then Paul cheers' me. I ask where he's from.
"Don't laugh," he pleads.
"I won't"
"Canning. The Valley."
I laugh, then quickly tell him I used to live in the Valley. Through the night, he will never ask and I will never reveal that I am from Toronto. I'm smitten with Valley guys. And I find myself with something to do while I'm enjoying my Keith's. I spend the rest of the evening enjoying brief encounters with Paul.
At some point well after Happy Hour, I asked Paul where he was staying.
"Across the street"
"At the hotel?"
"No in the parking lot, in my car. I'm going to nap before I drive back tomorrow."
It became obvious it was time to leave. And off I went into the night.
Well, I necked with Paul for a while and copped a couple really decent feels. Then I left after telling him I was going to the bar.
Halifax is like that. She will show you a good time, but will usually pull back at the last minute. Like many of her hookers.
Categories: Breeders, Clubs, Gay, People, Travel
Friday Feast #125
Appetizer
Which celebrity (or celebrities) do you think will make headlines this year?
I don't usually give two shits about celebrities, so I don't have an answer kicking around. I'm thinking that someone from the View will, since no one seems to be catching on those chicks are kicking up dirt for publicity. Plus we're due for a celebrity getting a BJ from some male trick in a wig. I'm thinking Tom Cruise at some Interstate rest stop.
Soup
They say that good things come in small packages? What is something little that you think is great?
LOL, I have to get my mind out of the gutter. Most great things that come in little packages are in fact illegal. I'll go with a tea bag.
Salad
Name a song that makes you want to dance.
I'm sorry, I don't spontaneously dance. Many things must be in play including the proper alignment of certain planets, to make me want to dance. So I can't narrow it down to a song.
Main Course
What is your favorite font?
Arial Rocks.
Dessert
If you were to write a do-it-yourself article, what would it be about?
I've been meaning to write one on how to stop procrastinating. Maybe I'll dust it off on the weekend.
Categories: Feast
Which celebrity (or celebrities) do you think will make headlines this year?
I don't usually give two shits about celebrities, so I don't have an answer kicking around. I'm thinking that someone from the View will, since no one seems to be catching on those chicks are kicking up dirt for publicity. Plus we're due for a celebrity getting a BJ from some male trick in a wig. I'm thinking Tom Cruise at some Interstate rest stop.
Soup
They say that good things come in small packages? What is something little that you think is great?
LOL, I have to get my mind out of the gutter. Most great things that come in little packages are in fact illegal. I'll go with a tea bag.
Salad
Name a song that makes you want to dance.
I'm sorry, I don't spontaneously dance. Many things must be in play including the proper alignment of certain planets, to make me want to dance. So I can't narrow it down to a song.
Main Course
What is your favorite font?
Arial Rocks.
Dessert
If you were to write a do-it-yourself article, what would it be about?
I've been meaning to write one on how to stop procrastinating. Maybe I'll dust it off on the weekend.
Categories: Feast
Friday Feast #124
I skipped #123 'cause I'm behind, and it's all about Christmas. Bah, humbug.
Appetizer
How do you usually celebrate on New Year's Eve?
I don't have a tradition and never plan for it. NYE just happens...although I don't recall the last time I was home for it. I brought in 007 at the haunt. To answer the question, I usually celebrate NYE drunk, and more likely to be in your lap than at home.
Soup
Name one thing unexpected that happened to you in 2006.
Getting my new job.
Salad
Where was your favorite place that you visited in 2006?
Halifax, of course.
Main Course
What resolution is your top priority for 2007?
As a rule, I don't make resolutions with the new year. Easter is a better timeframe for that, no? Why join a gym in January when patio weather is still 5 months away.
In any event, if something about you is a top priority for you to change, I suggest you don't wait till January to get off your arse and do something about it. Just a thought.
Dessert
Using just three words, describe 2006.
Pretty good year.
Categories: Feast
Appetizer
How do you usually celebrate on New Year's Eve?
I don't have a tradition and never plan for it. NYE just happens...although I don't recall the last time I was home for it. I brought in 007 at the haunt. To answer the question, I usually celebrate NYE drunk, and more likely to be in your lap than at home.
Soup
Name one thing unexpected that happened to you in 2006.
Getting my new job.
Salad
Where was your favorite place that you visited in 2006?
Halifax, of course.
Main Course
What resolution is your top priority for 2007?
As a rule, I don't make resolutions with the new year. Easter is a better timeframe for that, no? Why join a gym in January when patio weather is still 5 months away.
In any event, if something about you is a top priority for you to change, I suggest you don't wait till January to get off your arse and do something about it. Just a thought.
Dessert
Using just three words, describe 2006.
Pretty good year.
Categories: Feast
2006-12-25
Welcome to Halifax
Written on Thursday, I send this dispatch from the depths of Hell. Wait. That's not right. Halifax, that's it!
Dartmouth to be precise.
I lived in Dartmouth as a youngster and only started referring to Dartmouth as Halifax when I moved to Toronto simply to make it easier on those folk. Reason being Torontonians are too busy being self absorbed they think Newfies live in Halifax.
In fact, If you were to ask someone in Upper Canada to list the provinces from west to east, the response would be:
BC
Alberta
The Prairies
Ontario
Quebec
The Newfies
In any event, Halifax is a great town, and Dartmouth is across the harbour from it.
I have just returned from my walk. I took a longer one than usual as I have a new view.
Mom's swanky apartment is in a great hood - Sullivan's Pond. And within walking distance to Mic Mac. She sold her house earlier this year, located in a subdivision of identical houses in the outskirts of the city.
I took a tour of the pond and inspected the newly installed fountain. The pond of course is the result of a dam that was built as part of the Shubenacadie Canal. If you haven't heard of this canal before congrats to you for not having to endure the Nova Scotia school system. Also of note on the pond is a centennial flame, a totem pole and the gazebo, all surrounded by a couple hundred ducks.
The pond is quite picturesque, even in a snowless December. More picturesque is the view Alderney gate, so off I went to take in a view of Halifax. It takes a while to
become accustomed to the slower pace of life here. For example, I took a moment to reflect on the Tim's on the way. It was closed. It was an unusual and unnerving sight
for me.
I always take in the view of Halifax from Alderney Gate, which includes the Ferry Terminal and other municipal installations. The park and pier are at the old Dartmouth City Hall (which now serves as the HRM School Board). A perfect view of Downtown Halifax, the Old Bridge and whatever is parked in the outer harbour awaits. (On this particular night, two Oil Rigs and a
container ship). I see the last ferry to Halifax depart - with the standard complement of young guys on their way to the bars.
Now if you have ever stayed with Mom, you know it is a food marathon. Her goal I believe is to eat at every food establishment in the city.
It started as we left the airport yesterday. Our first stop was the Enfield Irving Big Stop, where a cheap and plentiful breakfast is served all day. Included for your toast is a choice of 6 kinds of jam! Dinner was at Fan's (formerly Fran's) at Shannon Plaza. Fan's specialises in food from Northern China, whose people apparently live off of deep fried
food. We go there every time I'm down, and it's consistently OK. You would recognise the plaza if you're a Trailer Park Boys fan - this is the place where Randy used to hustle, and where Julian ended up living in his car drunk out of his mind. (Season 4 episode 2)
Today was the big shopping day for Vic and I. We started of course at Mic Mac Mall, which is in fact my favourite mall. I used to hang out there all the time as a youngster, and immensely enjoy the selection of stores and service as compared to Toronto malls.
For example, at the Bay, the clerks at the cash make eye contact, use words like Hello, Please, Thank you. It's as if they're living the training manual. It's as if they think they are getting paid to provide service to customers - a formula that simply doesn't work in Toronto.
And it's not just the Bay, it's everywhere. The Sobey's, the Zellers, the Tim's (one of my large double-doubles came complete with a happy face on the lid). It's simply the way of life here.
So you know, Vic and I ate at one of my favourite spots - the Steak and Stein. The place is always busy and I find the food to always be good, although Mom tends to think it's going downhill. She's been saying that for five years. Their feature is the 3 ounce steak. I had three.
More to follow...
Categories: Travel
Dartmouth to be precise.
I lived in Dartmouth as a youngster and only started referring to Dartmouth as Halifax when I moved to Toronto simply to make it easier on those folk. Reason being Torontonians are too busy being self absorbed they think Newfies live in Halifax.
In fact, If you were to ask someone in Upper Canada to list the provinces from west to east, the response would be:
BC
Alberta
The Prairies
Ontario
Quebec
The Newfies
In any event, Halifax is a great town, and Dartmouth is across the harbour from it.
I have just returned from my walk. I took a longer one than usual as I have a new view.
Mom's swanky apartment is in a great hood - Sullivan's Pond. And within walking distance to Mic Mac. She sold her house earlier this year, located in a subdivision of identical houses in the outskirts of the city.
I took a tour of the pond and inspected the newly installed fountain. The pond of course is the result of a dam that was built as part of the Shubenacadie Canal. If you haven't heard of this canal before congrats to you for not having to endure the Nova Scotia school system. Also of note on the pond is a centennial flame, a totem pole and the gazebo, all surrounded by a couple hundred ducks.
The pond is quite picturesque, even in a snowless December. More picturesque is the view Alderney gate, so off I went to take in a view of Halifax. It takes a while to
become accustomed to the slower pace of life here. For example, I took a moment to reflect on the Tim's on the way. It was closed. It was an unusual and unnerving sight
for me.
I always take in the view of Halifax from Alderney Gate, which includes the Ferry Terminal and other municipal installations. The park and pier are at the old Dartmouth City Hall (which now serves as the HRM School Board). A perfect view of Downtown Halifax, the Old Bridge and whatever is parked in the outer harbour awaits. (On this particular night, two Oil Rigs and a
container ship). I see the last ferry to Halifax depart - with the standard complement of young guys on their way to the bars.
Now if you have ever stayed with Mom, you know it is a food marathon. Her goal I believe is to eat at every food establishment in the city.
It started as we left the airport yesterday. Our first stop was the Enfield Irving Big Stop, where a cheap and plentiful breakfast is served all day. Included for your toast is a choice of 6 kinds of jam! Dinner was at Fan's (formerly Fran's) at Shannon Plaza. Fan's specialises in food from Northern China, whose people apparently live off of deep fried
food. We go there every time I'm down, and it's consistently OK. You would recognise the plaza if you're a Trailer Park Boys fan - this is the place where Randy used to hustle, and where Julian ended up living in his car drunk out of his mind. (Season 4 episode 2)
Today was the big shopping day for Vic and I. We started of course at Mic Mac Mall, which is in fact my favourite mall. I used to hang out there all the time as a youngster, and immensely enjoy the selection of stores and service as compared to Toronto malls.
For example, at the Bay, the clerks at the cash make eye contact, use words like Hello, Please, Thank you. It's as if they're living the training manual. It's as if they think they are getting paid to provide service to customers - a formula that simply doesn't work in Toronto.
And it's not just the Bay, it's everywhere. The Sobey's, the Zellers, the Tim's (one of my large double-doubles came complete with a happy face on the lid). It's simply the way of life here.
So you know, Vic and I ate at one of my favourite spots - the Steak and Stein. The place is always busy and I find the food to always be good, although Mom tends to think it's going downhill. She's been saying that for five years. Their feature is the 3 ounce steak. I had three.
More to follow...
Categories: Travel
2006-12-19
Where the Lowest Price is Anarchy
Just came back from running some errands in preparation for the trip. I was after a couple shirts and PJ pants so I ended up at Zellers.
Now, Vic told me of a recent Zellers experience in which she purchased some chocolates from a massive display that were signed $1. They rang in at $1.09. She describes all the hoops she had to go through to get the refund here. I support anyone who even bothers to get a penny refunded. The $.09 isn't going to make or break Vic. But think about it. If Zellers managed to sell the entire display, they would have made around $36 in pure profit.
I was prepared. As you know, I have an eagle eye for making sure things ring up correctly. Zellers takes the fun out of the sport by making it easy.
Of the four items I purchased, one was marked regular price, and three were marked with a percentage discount. Two of the discounted items rang up at full price. Too small a sample size for sure to mention I was overcharged for half the items I purchased. The value of the overcharge you ask? $13.50. If I didn't notice, I would have paid 29% more.
So off I went to Customer Service, where the Customer is always a number. I was number 327. The clerk wasn't sure why I'd bother, since the cashier had corrected the error.
"You have entire displays of merchandise that you are overcharging for. The cashier didn't do anything about that."
The clerk didn't have an answer for me, but the manager was close by.
What Phil said:
The answer I was expecting to hear is that you would correct the prices or take down the signs. Appreciating the thousands of items you need to keep track of, I was good enought to point out two.
So, I called the head office to explain I wasn't happy with the outcome at the store and to confirm whether it is practice to put signs up, but not update the cash registers.
Their response was that Zellers tries hard to ensure their pricing is correct, but they are "not at 100%" (She wouldn't say what % they're at). Sometimes things are missed, particularly when there is a discount involved. Customers are invited to tell the cashier at point of sale if something rings too high.
To which I responded, "So, what I'm hearing is that it's Buyer Beware at Zellers"
No, she said. She would contact the store manager and ensure it's corrected.
OK, gentle readers. I've ranted about this before I know. You should be ranting as well. It is obviously going to happen that an item scans too high. Signs get missed after a sale, for example. It is purely unacceptable that the situation is not immediately taken care of. Neither is it acceptable to reduce prices before the cash register is updated.
In my retail days, my chain had easy-to-follow guidelines.
First off, a 2% error rate or better needed to be maintained. And error is scans too high, scans too low, or the product does not have a shelf sticker.
Second, signs go up once a sale starts, and come down after a sale ends.
Third, when the sign goes up, the item is scanned to ensure it was captured.
Fourth, when a large sale comes down, the price is checked again. All remaining sale items are audited to ensure they are still on sale.
So there you have it. A warning when shopping at Zellers, coupled with an inside scoop of how retailers can ensure price accuracy.
Categories: Retail, Rant
Now, Vic told me of a recent Zellers experience in which she purchased some chocolates from a massive display that were signed $1. They rang in at $1.09. She describes all the hoops she had to go through to get the refund here. I support anyone who even bothers to get a penny refunded. The $.09 isn't going to make or break Vic. But think about it. If Zellers managed to sell the entire display, they would have made around $36 in pure profit.
I was prepared. As you know, I have an eagle eye for making sure things ring up correctly. Zellers takes the fun out of the sport by making it easy.
Of the four items I purchased, one was marked regular price, and three were marked with a percentage discount. Two of the discounted items rang up at full price. Too small a sample size for sure to mention I was overcharged for half the items I purchased. The value of the overcharge you ask? $13.50. If I didn't notice, I would have paid 29% more.
So off I went to Customer Service, where the Customer is always a number. I was number 327. The clerk wasn't sure why I'd bother, since the cashier had corrected the error.
"You have entire displays of merchandise that you are overcharging for. The cashier didn't do anything about that."
The clerk didn't have an answer for me, but the manager was close by.
What Phil said:
- We have thousands of items and it's hard to keep track of all of them.
- Sorry.
- We put the signs up early so customers could benefit.
- I know this isn't the answer you would like to hear.
The answer I was expecting to hear is that you would correct the prices or take down the signs. Appreciating the thousands of items you need to keep track of, I was good enought to point out two.
So, I called the head office to explain I wasn't happy with the outcome at the store and to confirm whether it is practice to put signs up, but not update the cash registers.
Their response was that Zellers tries hard to ensure their pricing is correct, but they are "not at 100%" (She wouldn't say what % they're at). Sometimes things are missed, particularly when there is a discount involved. Customers are invited to tell the cashier at point of sale if something rings too high.
To which I responded, "So, what I'm hearing is that it's Buyer Beware at Zellers"
No, she said. She would contact the store manager and ensure it's corrected.
OK, gentle readers. I've ranted about this before I know. You should be ranting as well. It is obviously going to happen that an item scans too high. Signs get missed after a sale, for example. It is purely unacceptable that the situation is not immediately taken care of. Neither is it acceptable to reduce prices before the cash register is updated.
In my retail days, my chain had easy-to-follow guidelines.
First off, a 2% error rate or better needed to be maintained. And error is scans too high, scans too low, or the product does not have a shelf sticker.
Second, signs go up once a sale starts, and come down after a sale ends.
Third, when the sign goes up, the item is scanned to ensure it was captured.
Fourth, when a large sale comes down, the price is checked again. All remaining sale items are audited to ensure they are still on sale.
So there you have it. A warning when shopping at Zellers, coupled with an inside scoop of how retailers can ensure price accuracy.
Categories: Retail, Rant
Nathan Phillips Square
I was lucky enough to catch the Cavalcade of Lights at Nathan Phillips the other day. Basically, it's Nathan Phillips Square, but with thousands of lights.
Seriously, it was nice to see the projection display on Old City Hall. I enjoyed watching the dozens of people - from all corners of the city and world - skating under the arches.
If you get a chance, give this a look.
I snagged this photo from the Torontoist Flickr Pool. Metrix ' grabbed this shot. Be sure to check out his other work.
Categories: Toronto
Seriously, it was nice to see the projection display on Old City Hall. I enjoyed watching the dozens of people - from all corners of the city and world - skating under the arches.
If you get a chance, give this a look.
I snagged this photo from the Torontoist Flickr Pool. Metrix ' grabbed this shot. Be sure to check out his other work.
Categories: Toronto
It's Christmas already?
I sit in disbelief.
It seemed like only last week I was sitting on the phone with my sister and mother negotiating my trip to Halifax for Christmas. I remember it well - my planned 4 day excursion became an 8 day marathon.
The marathon begins at some ungodly pre-dawn hour tomorrow. I am not prepared. Not for an early wake-up, not for a trip, and certainly not for Christmas. Is this something that can be postponed? Can we defer the birth of Christ until the new year?
I think I'm looking forward to the trip. It will be good to spend time with Mom and Vic. Not like Survivor, but definately like the Amazing Race, where the next destination is always a restaurant. Also, it will be nice to chill at Rejections Cabaret for a spell.
Vic's husband has to stay behind due to work. He has been appointed the official caregiver to Mookie.
Ah, Mookie. The poor thing is currently catching a nap in my bedroom closet, unaware of the impending abandonment. It has taken me over 3 years to train the shithead how to live with me. All will be lost in the space of a week. Is he ever going to be pissed!
So, wish me well. I shall try to keep in touch to provide updates.
Categories: Life, Mookie
It seemed like only last week I was sitting on the phone with my sister and mother negotiating my trip to Halifax for Christmas. I remember it well - my planned 4 day excursion became an 8 day marathon.
The marathon begins at some ungodly pre-dawn hour tomorrow. I am not prepared. Not for an early wake-up, not for a trip, and certainly not for Christmas. Is this something that can be postponed? Can we defer the birth of Christ until the new year?
I think I'm looking forward to the trip. It will be good to spend time with Mom and Vic. Not like Survivor, but definately like the Amazing Race, where the next destination is always a restaurant. Also, it will be nice to chill at Rejections Cabaret for a spell.
Vic's husband has to stay behind due to work. He has been appointed the official caregiver to Mookie.
Ah, Mookie. The poor thing is currently catching a nap in my bedroom closet, unaware of the impending abandonment. It has taken me over 3 years to train the shithead how to live with me. All will be lost in the space of a week. Is he ever going to be pissed!
So, wish me well. I shall try to keep in touch to provide updates.
Categories: Life, Mookie
2006-12-17
I can't find a coffee shop
Of little use to anyone, I present you with a Tim's and Starbucks store locator.
I'm not sure about your parts, but in Toronto, you can't swing a cat without hitting a coffee shop. It just seems more efficient to simply look for one than to ask someone where one is.
But that's just me.
I wait for a connecting bus to work in the morning at Bayview and Eglinton. About twice a year, I'm asked by a stranger where a coffee shop is. I can see four places in which to get coffee without turning my head.
"What kind do you want," is my reply.
It is actually fascinating to see how many Tims there are. At what point is the market saturated? I used their online Trip Planner (yes, they indeed have one, just like their commercial suggested). I planned a trip from here to central Montreal. Within a kilometre of my route are 52 Tim's. That's one evey 10 km.
And if you've travelled with me, you've likely been to every one of them.
Categories: Links
I'm not sure about your parts, but in Toronto, you can't swing a cat without hitting a coffee shop. It just seems more efficient to simply look for one than to ask someone where one is.
But that's just me.
I wait for a connecting bus to work in the morning at Bayview and Eglinton. About twice a year, I'm asked by a stranger where a coffee shop is. I can see four places in which to get coffee without turning my head.
"What kind do you want," is my reply.
It is actually fascinating to see how many Tims there are. At what point is the market saturated? I used their online Trip Planner (yes, they indeed have one, just like their commercial suggested). I planned a trip from here to central Montreal. Within a kilometre of my route are 52 Tim's. That's one evey 10 km.
And if you've travelled with me, you've likely been to every one of them.
Categories: Links
Fond Memories
You may have heard that a Toronto landmark was a victim of a 5-alram fire this week.
Poor Sassafraz is no more. Where will those celebrities go to chill out now?
I have fond memories from the 'Fraz, as I liked to call it. Now let it be understood: I'm not one of those princessesses that hang out at places just to be cool. Far from it - I find that a little artificial. In fact, I'm the type of dude that hangs out at places that aren't cool.
At the last company I worked for a number of years ago I met a great bunch of friends. We have all moved on, but all manage to get together about once a year.
At one point, we had formed a Dinner Club. Once a month, we would go out to Dine. I won't speak for the rest of the flock, but I was generally drunk before the main course came. The club came to an end shortly after we suffered through an entire dinner listening to one of teh flock decree motions on who could, and could not be part of the Club.
So we stopped sending him the invite.
Back to the 'Fraz. One particular month it was chosen as the spot.
We were all on our best behaviour.
The waitress was an absoute eccentric. More so than an ass wiping wand. She in fact was over the top. I believe her accent to be fake. I am pretty sure she had an orgasm when she recited the specials of the evening. The older gentleman at the next table was absolutely apalled when the waitress took away his escort's special to show our table the wonderful presentation.
"Luke at ze vondervul preezentishun," said the waitress as quivered and twitched.
Should we be appalled as well? Is this the proper thing to do to fit in at this surreal eatery? But how can I act appalled when I'm laughing? So I did the best thing I could think of. I ordered the special. It was wonderfully presented, after all.
The absolute highlight of the evening came with the meals. One of our ladies had excused herself just before the main course came.
"I shall get ze leed for ze ladiz plate," said the waitress as she scurried off.
Emilia immediately looked intrigued.
Emilia: Wow, how classy. She's getting a leed for the plate.
Ian (Laughing): How classy are you by making fun of her fake accent.
Emilia: What?
At that moment the waitress returned with a metal lid, and put it on the plate.
Emilia had a baffled look on her face.
Ian: It's a lid, Emilia. A lid.
Emilia: Oh. I thought she was bringing something I've never heard of before.
All: Out of control laughter.
As you can imagine, I bring up this story during our annual reunion. It's on the play list with Effie's kidney stone, John's codeine addiction and the fact I had sex with Joe.
So farewell, 'Fraz. Thanks for the memories.
Categories: Friends, Toronto
Poor Sassafraz is no more. Where will those celebrities go to chill out now?
I have fond memories from the 'Fraz, as I liked to call it. Now let it be understood: I'm not one of those princessesses that hang out at places just to be cool. Far from it - I find that a little artificial. In fact, I'm the type of dude that hangs out at places that aren't cool.
At the last company I worked for a number of years ago I met a great bunch of friends. We have all moved on, but all manage to get together about once a year.
At one point, we had formed a Dinner Club. Once a month, we would go out to Dine. I won't speak for the rest of the flock, but I was generally drunk before the main course came. The club came to an end shortly after we suffered through an entire dinner listening to one of teh flock decree motions on who could, and could not be part of the Club.
So we stopped sending him the invite.
Back to the 'Fraz. One particular month it was chosen as the spot.
We were all on our best behaviour.
The waitress was an absoute eccentric. More so than an ass wiping wand. She in fact was over the top. I believe her accent to be fake. I am pretty sure she had an orgasm when she recited the specials of the evening. The older gentleman at the next table was absolutely apalled when the waitress took away his escort's special to show our table the wonderful presentation.
"Luke at ze vondervul preezentishun," said the waitress as quivered and twitched.
Should we be appalled as well? Is this the proper thing to do to fit in at this surreal eatery? But how can I act appalled when I'm laughing? So I did the best thing I could think of. I ordered the special. It was wonderfully presented, after all.
The absolute highlight of the evening came with the meals. One of our ladies had excused herself just before the main course came.
"I shall get ze leed for ze ladiz plate," said the waitress as she scurried off.
Emilia immediately looked intrigued.
Emilia: Wow, how classy. She's getting a leed for the plate.
Ian (Laughing): How classy are you by making fun of her fake accent.
Emilia: What?
At that moment the waitress returned with a metal lid, and put it on the plate.
Emilia had a baffled look on her face.
Ian: It's a lid, Emilia. A lid.
Emilia: Oh. I thought she was bringing something I've never heard of before.
All: Out of control laughter.
As you can imagine, I bring up this story during our annual reunion. It's on the play list with Effie's kidney stone, John's codeine addiction and the fact I had sex with Joe.
So farewell, 'Fraz. Thanks for the memories.
Categories: Friends, Toronto
2006-12-15
Friday Feast #122
Appetizer What was your very first job with a paycheck?
My first job with an actual cheque was working for BBM back in the mid-80s. My job was to call folks to do TV and Radio ratings surveys. The pay was decent ($5.50 an hour), and it was back in the days where you could smoke. I lasted there for a year.
Soup
Did you ever lose something really important to you?
The most important thing to me that I've lost is my father. See, I'm not always a material girl!
Salad
What is the best Christmas present you ever received?
Probably that kidney. Just kidding. I've been fortunate enough to receive some pretty decent gifts in my day. I think my favourite was the police scanner.
Main Course
Tell about a favorite "hang out" place for you and your friends when you were in high school.
I wasn't really into the hang out crowd in high school. I had just moved to Toronto in time for high school. I suppose we hung out the most at a donut shop.
Dessert
Name something that always brings a smile to your face.
Seeing people fall.
Categories: Feast
My first job with an actual cheque was working for BBM back in the mid-80s. My job was to call folks to do TV and Radio ratings surveys. The pay was decent ($5.50 an hour), and it was back in the days where you could smoke. I lasted there for a year.
Soup
Did you ever lose something really important to you?
The most important thing to me that I've lost is my father. See, I'm not always a material girl!
Salad
What is the best Christmas present you ever received?
Probably that kidney. Just kidding. I've been fortunate enough to receive some pretty decent gifts in my day. I think my favourite was the police scanner.
Main Course
Tell about a favorite "hang out" place for you and your friends when you were in high school.
I wasn't really into the hang out crowd in high school. I had just moved to Toronto in time for high school. I suppose we hung out the most at a donut shop.
Dessert
Name something that always brings a smile to your face.
Seeing people fall.
Categories: Feast
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